What are complexes in a person and how to get rid of them


Posted on Aug 23, 2022      60


What are complexes in a person in simple words?

Intrusive thoughts, which are based on dissatisfaction with themselves - this is something with which each of us is faced. In modern psychology, it is common to hang the label “complexed” on people to whom they are peculiar. What does this concept include, and why in society it is negative, even repulsive?

If you are familiar with the thoughts concerning dissatisfaction with their own appearance or any other qualities of their personality, then you know firsthand that it is more difficult for a person with complexes to lead an active social life. Why does it happen?

Morbidly complex assumed to be people who see in themselves flaws, often invented, and perceive them painfully. Some are dissatisfied with their own figure, some dislike the naturally curly hair, an abundance of freckles, the shape or size of a certain body part.

Naturally, a person with complexes is deprived of self-confidence, and with it the authority in the eyes of others. After all, respect and favor from the outside begin with love for oneself, a feeling that fills a person from within. People with complexes are characterized by low self-esteem and a kind of timidity (very shy away from society and afraid to be in public).

How to get rid of complexes: 10 simple ways

Get rid of intrusive thoughts and fears can only be if the path of acceptance themselves is as we are. It will comprise only ten steps. As the main thing here is to start. Below, we share with you a description of all ten steps or ways to get rid of complexes.

Try to find out the reason.

First, it is important to simply recognize your complexes, if any at all. Even attempts to camouflage a small pimple with a foundation or a desire to hide the features of your figure under a certain type of clothing show obsessive thoughts. If you think you are in something bad, you need to figure out what was the basis for this opinion. In 99 cases out of 100, the answer will be something like, “I think these shortcomings are obvious”. I am not the only one who notices them.

Probably someone once suggested to you that there is something wrong with you. This could have been done unconsciously and with no malice at all (complexes “from childhood”, instilled by your mother or father, etc.). Now think, don’t you think it is unfair that someone, even the closest and dearest person (especially!) has made you think about your own inferiority, has caused you to lose the feeling of satisfaction with yourself and with life?

Objectively assess the situation

No one is perfect, just as in life simply can not always be all smooth sailing. Failures, there will be reasons to complex even a lady or Mr. perfect. And all “complexed” people are separated from such people only by fixation on their imaginary (!) shortcomings.

Objectively, any person suffers some kind of deprivation and does not conform to the mythical image of an ideal person.

Say No to Fear

In particular, we are talking about fear of public opinion. If you act on it, then one day you may realize that you do not live your life. You can’t please everyone - there will always be as many opinions as there are people. Do not be afraid to seem ridiculous and even ridiculous.

Take risks, make mistakes and don’t get hung up if you suddenly fail, and then eventually you will reveal the real you and feel that you are living your life only. It’s a wonderful, incomparable feeling, which, perhaps, is the true happiness and meaning of being.

Try to act “on the contrary”.

Complexes are a kind of rebellion of your psyche against yourself. As far back as the ancients came up with one simple thought: "If you can't defeat a rebellion, lead it. Take charge of your own complexes by immersing yourself completely in them.

Try to do what you are afraid to do. Are you afraid of the possibility of being ridiculed for not knowing how to dance or sing? Dance from the heart or chant your favorite song in a crowded karaoke club. Taste your complexes, savor them and ... forget them altogether!

Treat your own mistakes philosophically

Perhaps as a child you were scolded or criticized for something. This could happen at home, at school, or in the classroom in the creative club. Systematic, or once, but “for life”. Returning to the first item on this list, most complexes appear in childhood. It’s all in the past.

Now you are an adult, a wise person - not the child who was tried to be flawless and imposed thoughts like “there is no right to make a mistake”. Everyone and everyone has it. Along with a chance to correct any mistake, as long as you really need it.

Focus on your strengths

Up to writing your own positive qualities on paper. You can even divide the sheet into two parts - “pros” and “cons” - and compare what’s bigger. The column with the “+” will be significantly longer. If, of course, you follow the second item on this list.

Stop comparing yourself with others.

The only person with whom it is acceptable to compare yourself is you yesterday. The other people cannot be better or worse than you. They are just different. Each of us is unique, interesting in our own way. Respect that individuality in other people and, most of all, in yourself.

Love life

We sleep for a third of our lives and work the same amount. We just don’t have time to be self-deprecating. Don’t waste what little rest of your beautiful, precious life on sad thoughts and tears for the lost opportunities they have robbed us of.

Believe in yourself.

Think seriously at least once about how good it feels to be you. Not someone else, but that unique person who you are. Now realize that you can achieve anything you truly want. From this statement logically follows the next item on the list of steps to getting rid of complexes and self-acceptance...

Take action!

This is the most obvious, understandable and the most difficult item to perform. If something specific is the source of your complexes (dissatisfaction with your figure, social status, etc.) - set a goal to change it. Decide what exactly you can do and ... do it! Everything will work out. If in doubt, read the ninth point again.


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